Inner Engineering

//Wednesday, February 11, 2009 7:31 AM

Meant To BEE

There's a reason for the title of this post :D
U'll know on valentine's day. Hehe.

Ok, where do I start?

It's been a really hectic week so far.
And, let me explain for the millionth time(so bedek, less than that lah but ALOT), the engagement is not a grand one.

Just because it's held at a chalet, DOESN'T MEAN IT'S GRAND.

1st reason: Mum don't want to use the house because we don't want some people to go around and say completely crappy stuffs about me and Iqbal's engagement. (Only some people understands this point.)

2nd reason: We don't actually have a place we call HOME. House, Yes. Home, No. We still feel ............... (Again, only some people will understand)

3rd reason: Mum wants things to be different from the rest so far. Just a little bit unique.

4th reason: Mum wants to shout to the whole world about the love me and Iqbal have for each other. (There'll be something that will prove this point on the engagement day and AT the engagement place)

5th reason: Just another family + friends gathering where all are able to enjoy, relax and just have fun for the day. (and I know it's on V-day; so if u have other plans, I really don't mind, really)

So, please understand that it's not grand. If it's grand, I will make some dinner arrangement and some country club or hotel and send out invites via cards and people are to come in formal.

And, come with a sincere heart. If there's even just 1% of your heart REALLY DON'T WANT TO GO because you just hate the fact that me and him are getting engaged OR because you'd rather be at some other place OR you just have a problem with the engagement day or for any other reason, please do not hesitate to make ur mind to not attend.

Oh, ___(to be unknown for reputation) had a miscommunication

and my gown will be ready only on Friday. THIS FRIDAY.

Yes, ONE DAY BEFORE THE BIG DAY. ONE DAY.

It should have been ready today but something

happened because of one arrogant minah.

If anything bad happens to the dress, I'm suing. Haha.

Nvm lah. Things happen for a reason anyway.

Just, give me back my money OR discount lah, hehe...

Hmmmm.... Been going in and out of Johor to get lots of stuffs. Everything was within and lesser than budget

because SOMEONE has a lot of lobang there. hehe.

Discounts EVERYWHERE. And some stuffs, got it for free. Hahah.

The guy didn't want to take any money even

when we forced him just because

SOMEONE is a dear friend of his.

But, thanks. Appreciated much much much!

For a friend,
YOU DO NOT KNOW HOW IT FEELS LIKE TO REALLY NOT HAVE A FATHER AT ALL. HOW COULD YOU SAY THAT HAVING A FATHER FEELS LIKE NOT HAVING A FATHER. FOR GOODNESS SAKE, YOU DID A TERRIBLE HUGE MISTAKE AND STILL YOUR FATHER ACCEPTED HER AND JUST TRIES TO DO HIS BEST TO SETTLE THE PROBLEM. JUST, GROW UP.
I have a father, but I don't even know what a father's love is. I got it from a someone, but now I don't feel it at all. And now, another Godfather comes in and pours all his love for me. But it doesn't feel right because I feel like I'm stealing him away from YOU. You don't know how he feels. He is your father, YOUR FATHER.
My father did so many mistakes and never did redeem himself. But what did I do? I still respect him. I still love him. I still have faith in him even though no one else has. I still have faith that he's coming for the big day. Even though that faith is only just a little bit.
Ok, stop. If not, another session of Silent Cry Alone with Time on the Bed at Night. Haha.

Such a weak soul. Yet, the Should-Know people don't see it. LOL.

Anyhoos, just want to reconfirm the address of the place.

Costa Sands Resort (Pasir Ris) - Not the one at the downtown east, further in abit.
Blk S1 for my side and Blk U2 for Iqbal's side. Just the opposite anyway. Ok?

People make mistakes. All the time.

We either learn the easy way or the hard way.

Ultimately, good things will happen.

Just accept and let go of the past.

Labels: acceptance, blessings, needed, unfolds

//Saturday, February 07, 2009 8:13 AM

Serenity

Our minds are as different as our faces: we are all traveling to one destination; --happiness; but MANY are going the different road.

True isn't it?

Look at where I'm heading and I'm very much happy with it.

But as per normal, I can't have my happiness UNTIL I go through obstacles.

I know many encounter this right?

And if u don't, I guess u are God damn lucky. Haha. Treasure it.

You know, whatever that happens, or which ever road I've taken;

it doesn't matter if u're gonna get a good life or not.

But for this road I've taken, I know Allah will guide me through it.

Because things happen for good reasons.

Don't try to separate me from him.

God, please help me, I've loved him just too much.

People, please, just let us be together always.

In sadness or happiness.

We'll make it through, one way or another.

Because we know He's always guiding us.

Don't tell me that fights, arguments or disagreements don't occur in many relationships.

Because at the end of the day, it's still based on Tender, Loving and Care.

That's what I have in mine with Mr Beloved and Mdm Precious.

Isn't this what you want?

At least, this is what I need; extremely.

And this is what want; definitely.

Quoted:

To be happy, we must not be too concerned about others - Albert Camus

Happiness depends upon ourselves - Aristotle

I guess ultimately, all I want to say is that;

if you think that having something or someone is your greatest happiness,

then by all means, go for it.

Don't let others distract you or affect you in any way.

It's YOUR happiness now.

//Wednesday, February 04, 2009 8:36 AM

Time Bomb

SOMEBODY has been telling people not to come for engagement.

Why are you stooping so low?

OOOOPSS!! If you think that's gonna break me down,
you can jolly well

TRY TO

Just because I ALWAYS keep quiet when people treat me like SHIT, that doesn't mean I will forgive and forget. This time, I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU NOR FORGET WHATEVER YOU HAVE DONE.

NO ONE HAS SEEN THIS BLOODY TEMPER OF MINE FOR A LONG LONG TIME.

You might see it on the day I get the signal from God.

Oh, and if you think I'm gonna be ruined, I am so sorry to disappoint you but I have MORE people I love so much and they're helping me to get to what I want.

MORE THAN EVER,

My MUM.

My BOYFRIEND.

BRO & SIS

My MUM'S SIDE OF FAMILY.

CIK DIN & FAMILY.

AND NOTABLY,

MY FRIENDS!

Even if just those people u've swayed to not come, HAHAH!! I don't need them lah. I have more who will be there for me till the end.

QUANTITY is NOT A BIG DEAL.

DO NOT PISS ME OFF!

Labels: anger, BLOWUP